Tribe of the Sun

Saying Goodbye to a Friend

2011-04-21T13:37:00.000-07:00

I donated a car this morning...a Chevy Geo Storm that had been in my life since 1998. That car got me to Texas, thru my second husband and thru most of my college career.

I've had a new car for a couple years now and a friend of mine has been driving her for a while but still, she's been a part of my life for a long time.

Years ago I had a friend who traded in her old Toyota Tercel for a new Toyota Tercel. She cried when she handed over the keys. She explained to me that her old car had been in her life for 12 years. Even though she was getting a brand new car, it still hurt. I didn't understand at the time.

I'm not going to lie, I cried a little this morning. The tow truck driver was a real sweatheart. He assured me that she would be auctioned off and someone would buy her and give her the love and care she needed. That really did help. All I can do now is hope she ends up somewhere where she will be appreciated.

A Mindful Weekend

2011-03-27T16:19:00.000-07:00

As mentioned from my previous blog entry Being Punched in the Emotional Junk by the Dalai Lama, I spent last Sunday at the San Antonio Art Museum. What you do not know is that either at the museum or shortly thereafter (possibly while reading some of the literature I picked up on Buddhism and Tibetan Dieties), I picked up a new friend.

At first, all I felt was some subtle vibrations, unlike any entity I have met before but by Tuesday he has made himself known to me...the Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara. This deity is very well known throughout the Mahayana Buddhist world. He is a complex character with a multitude of names and aspects (both male and female). One of his female guises is of course the popular Guanyin. Needless to say, I have spent these last few days getting to know him and reading extensively about him.

Avalokitesvara is extraordinarily compassionate for all living things. It is said that he halted his own progress to becoming a Buddha so that he could help the rest of humankind reach their own enlightenment. While he has aspects of both sexes, I feel that the aspect hanging out with me is male, so I am referring to this being as "him."

So, besides spending this weekend learning all about Buddhism, I have also tried to be mindful of all my actions. The idea of mindfulness is to live in the present. Most people live either with their mind in the past or their attention focused on the future (or both). Very few of us are able to be present in each and every moment. I had many things I wanted to get done today, so it was the perfect opportunity to try and be mindful.

First, I went to my gym for a yoga/tai chi/pilates class where I was successfully mindful of the fact that I was getting ass handed to me by our instructor. Luckily, from the moaning and groaning going on from my classmates, I believe the rest of the class was also very present in the same painful moment (or in this case, hour). I then dragged my tired self to the rest of the errands on my list, including going back down to the museum to finish taking the pictures I didn't take last weekend. While I didn't get everything done, I feel good about what I did finish.

My days have become so busy with the "have-to's" on my to do list that I find myself unable to finish the "I-want-to's." This leads me to feel guilty about all the things I feel that I have been neglecting. I got a lot of stuff done today and I feel good about it. Maybe being more mindful of each and every task will help me feel more joy in what I need to do, leaving me some energy to do all the extra stuff.

Being Punched in the Emotional Junk by the Dalai Lama

2011-03-21T08:38:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my husband and I celebrated our third wedding anniversary by having Thai food and sushi and then hitting the San Antonio Art Museum. This is what we did for our first date many years ago. Lunch was excellent. I had sushi and he had Domino Tofu and we split a spring roll. The restaurant has a gorgeous water fountain of the Buddha's face so I snapped a pic before we left.

We headed to the art museum. I had brought my camera because I wanted to take some pictures of the Greek and Roman statuary. Once we got there, we decided to view the special exhibit first, The Missing Peace: Artists Consider the Dalai Lama. First off, the exhibit was outstanding. While we enjoy art, we aren't the sort that's spends alot of time studying the pieces but some of the works were stunning and it took us a while to wander through it all. It's starts off with paintings, pictures and other items of his holiness, the Dalai Lama and Tibetan Buddhism. Then, as you continue on there are more Buddhism-inspired abstract works. The theme then shifted and the art works became about change, pain and suffering.

While the entire exhibit was powerful and moving, I ran into one particular piece that really socked me in the heart chakra. The painting is called "Abu Ghraib by" Rupert Garcia. It is based on one of the terrible pictures of the prisoner abuse scandal that came out of the Abu Ghraib prison during the Iraq War. I started to cry when I saw it. As a human being, the things that were done by our countrymen is horrible and as a former soldier my heart aches in shame for what was done by people that wore the same uniform as me.

Oh and one more thing...I served in US Army from 1988 to 1991 and I was stationed in Darmstadt, Germany with the 165th MI Battalion, which was one of the battalions in the 205th MI Brigade. The 205th MI Brigade was directly involved in the prisoner abuse at Abu Ghraib and has since been disbanded (along with 165th MI Bn). While I nor did anyone I know have anything to do with these atrocities, at the same time I can't help to make it personal. The unit patch that I am wearing in my picture of my myself as a PFC is now a patch of shame.

All of this and more went through my head at the museum yesterday. Both my husband and I were pretty upset so we cut our trip short and skipped the rest of the museum. I came home and worked on an artistic response to what I had seen.

I took the face of Buddha from the fountain picture and put it on a green background of lotus blossoms. I am trying to focus on this image, instead of the one I saw yesterday.

Making Bread and the Pomba Gira

2011-03-20T20:43:00.000-07:00

Two and a half weeks ago I was at my wits end. Work had become insane (a certain federal agency had changed some very important rules effective immediately), everyone I knew seem to be having personal issues and I had just had enough. I came home, threw an altar together and prayed to the Pomba Gira for some fast help. I promised her that if she helped I would bake her some Portugeuse sweet bread (her favorite) before the spring equinox.

Needless to say, the next day that same federal agency not only changed it's mind and rescinded the changes but issued something dangerously close to an apology. Problems that have been around for months have completely cleared up and most of my ohana seems to be doing better.

So last night, I started the Portuguese Sweet Bread. It is actually the most complicated bread I make. Multiple steps, lost of ingredients and I make the whole thing by hand for maximum ache'...oh and it takes about 18 hours total. As I was kneeding the dough, I was working so hard that my yoga pants were falling off my butt. I'm covered in sweat and flour is now stuck to the sweat so I am looking REAL sexy and I don't want to stop until the 15 minutes of kneeding was done. As my yoga pants fall down to my ankles, I couldn't help but laugh at myself and how ridiculus I must look.

At that moment I felt happy. Maybe it was just being in the absurdity of the moment. Even though I was making that bread for her, I may have gotten just as much out of that loaf as she did. I baked that bread this morning and carved three chunks out of it so I could insert three candles. It ended up looking really cool.

I'll let sit for a day and then go feed some birds with it.

The Mystery of Ariadne

2010-05-22T09:08:00.000-07:00

So, I'm in office yesterday afternoon (5/21/10), working when a strong presence showed up. Whoever this was actually causing a strong pressure in my left temple. They didn't feel like anyone I knew.

After some detective work, we were able to determine the presence was the Cretan Goddess, Ariadne. I had never met her before yesterday.

I don't know why she is here, hence the mystery, but after seeing the movie "Percy Jackson and the Lightening Thief," I have been bulking up on my Greek mythology. Many of the deities that have come into our group have come in because someone brought them in, the list of divine ones who have shown up out of the blue is short. Real short.

Maybe the timing is related...or not.

She is definately a love goddess and has strong connections with the deep ocean and the deep earth. She feels peaceful. Besides my temples, I can also feel her in my heart chakra.

She likes caves and mazes and I have already made plans to visit a large cave formation here in Central Texas next weekend. I'm hoping she'll come with us and maybe we can glean a little more info from her.

The Economics of Beanie Babies

2010-04-30T17:14:00.000-07:00

I was listening to the radio this morning and the topic of discussion was the Broadway play “Enron” based, of course, on the fall of Enron the energy company. There were discussing economic boom and bust cycles referred to as “bubbles” which took my mind back to my own family boom and bust experience.

Years ago, one of my family members (“Lana”) started investing her money into beanie babies, which were shit hot at the time. She bought a magazine dedicated to Beanie Babies and used that to guide her in her investment purchases. She estimated she probably spent a couple of thousand dollars went it was all said and done.

Then, something happened…I seem to recall it being medical in nature…Lana and her boyfriend needed cash fast. They finally decided to liquidate to their Beanie Baby collection. They were shocked when their collection didn’t yield the return they were expected. After all the time, money and energy they sold all of their collection for a couple of hundred dollars.

Lana and I ended up having a conversation about it. I explained to her that the magazine she was using had a vested interest in hyping the Beanie Baby craze so that people would continue to purchase both the stuffed animals and the magazine. All the hype fed on itself, right up until the bubble burst and a lot of people like Lana are left holding a bunch of mostly worthless junk.

Whether you are talking about the stock market, the .com industry or the house-flipping crazy, I have seen many bubbles blow up and burst and I always go back to Lana’s Beanie Babies. Lana kept of a few of her favorites and she can take comfort in knowing those stuffed animals are still worth more than Enron stock.

The Inner Artist

2010-04-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

I was watching a youth football game yesterday with the mother of my step-children when a little boy ran by in a homemade mask, to which she commented “don’t you wish we were still that creative?” I responded with “what are talking about…I am still creative.”

I went on to explain that because I am doing web design and graphic arts stuff, both at work and for my personal websites, I get to be creative all the time. So this got me thinking…how many adults are like her, feeling they have no creative outlet in their life.

We force our children to take art in school, usually through high school, because we know that exposure to art in its many forms is critical to developing a well-rounded person, yet how many adults completely abandon any sort of creative activities when they get older.

While I still draw like a drunken second grader, I can use digital tools to create my masterpieces. Instead of displaying my macaroni collages on the front of the refrigerator, I display mine on the internet, for the whole world to see.

Does this make me a happier person…yes, most definitely. I think everyone needs to have a way to express themselves, either by creating art or even just appreciating it. Last year I took a friend to an art museum who had never been to one. She loved it. She had a fabulous experience and she left feeling great.

The medical experts have recommendations for how much exercise we should get a week and how many fruits and vegetables we should consume per day so how about a recommendation on how much finger-painting time we should get in per month?

Can't you just see it?...“The art institute for good mental health recommends every adult gets at least three hours of coloring a month.”

I like it!

The Moron in the Garden

2010-04-18T16:29:00.000-07:00

So, picture a beautiful day last week and I was lucky enough to have taken the day off. I headed out to our local botanical gardens, camera in hand to snap some pics and soak in some plant vibes.

Throughout the gardens, there were these gorgeous red ornamental poppies. I got several great pics of them and I wanted to know what they were. I asked several people but no one seemed to know. On my way out, I asked the guy at the front desk and he said he didn't know but there was an older gentleman standing there who asked me to show him. We walked outside and I pointed at them and the gentleman explained that they were an ornamental hybrid. He also explained that there was a native poppy that was closely related which confused me cause while I'm not an expert, I couldn't think of a native poppy that looked anything like that one.

We continued to talk and then the guy tried to explain to me that our local Prickly Poppy (Agremone spp.)wasn't a poppy at all, but a member of Euphorb family. I had to stop him at that point and tell him that he was mistaken. He just kept insisting that he was right.

Mr Moron went to use the facilities and the guy at the counter explained to me that Mr. Moron has worked at the garden for 28 years and his expertise was in cacti. I left the gardens scratching my head. I headed home and immediately looked up the Prickly Poppy. Good news, I'm not crazy and it is in fact a member of the poppy family.

I think the guy was a moron not because he was wrong, but because he kept insisting he was right and wouldn't even consider the idea that he might have been mistaken.

I don't ever want to be that way. I'm human and I make mistakes. I am open to the idea that no matter what the subject matter, there is someone out there that knows more than I do.

The Fog

2010-04-14T19:05:00.001-07:00

Yesterday morning was quite foggy in South Central Texas. I love the fog and I would like to tell you why.

A long time ago in a place far, far away, I was dumb enough to get myself involved in a nasty little witch war. For those of you lucky enough to not know what that is…consider yourself lucky. Witch wars are when two or more groups started throwing some very nasty energy at each other. Everybody gets real paranoid and suddenly you can’t tell if that hangnail is just a hangnail or the result of some bad spell hitting you in the tuckus. It’s the kind of thing that makes solitaires go running for their broom closets.

Anyway, the one and only witch war I got myself into got quite ugly and in the midst of it, my marriage ended, much to my surprise. In the course of a single evening, I packed up all my crap and had to find a place to live, quick. I called an acquiantance, whom I had only known for a short time, and arrange to rent one of her bedrooms in her large house out in the country.

The next morning, I moved in what belongings I had and within a couple of hours, a wonderful dense fog had descended and stuck around for about three days. It was the first real peace I had experienced in almost a year. I asked who was responsible and was told and old, African deity named Nyambe (sp?). For three days I was able to walk around the country in complete and utter silence. It was a wonderful, almost womby feeling. I was able to spend those days dealing with what had happened to me and come to peace with the knowledge that I had to take responsibilty for my part in the craziness.

When the fog lifted, I was ready to face the world again. I spent the next six weeks figuring out who were my friends (short list) and who were not (long list). Those foggy days gave me the confidence to know I was being protected and I felt after that I knew I could face anything.

I love foggy days now. They bring a smile to face and I enjoy embracing the quiet. They also serve as a reminder not to allow myself to get into silly situations.

A good passing

2010-04-11T11:05:00.000-07:00

When the time has come for a loved one to pass on to the next stage, my recommendation is always the same...ask Oya for a safe, quick and easy passing.

The father-in-law of a friend just passed this morning from a terminal illness. He took a turn for the worst a few days ago, and we sent our prayers to Oya. My friend reported that he passed this morning with a peaceful smile on his face.

Praise be to Oya for helping our extended family once again. May his spirit move on quickly and he be taken into the fold of the creator of his choosing and may his family find the love and comfort they need at this time.

Ache and blessed be.

An Unusual Initiation

2010-04-09T15:05:00.000-07:00

A priestess, like a parent, should never show favoritism. A priestess is going to have students that he or she likes more than others. I want to talk about the one student I had that I really didn’t like. This student, that I will call Zoe, is why I now stand firm with my year and a day rule.

Zoe was a friend of a friend that came into my life almost a decade ago. She was a bit older but I actually prefer older students (less drama) and she seemed very eager to learn. After a couple of months, she asked to become my student and I said yes. At first, everything seemed to be fine but after awhile Zoe became this whiney, bitchy lump that constantly complained about everything. She also had very strange habits (dietary, lifestyle, etc) with no sense to them. Some stranger would tell her some wild ass thing and it would be gospel but when I or our group elder would try to tell her something she would become very hostile…almost combative.

We just couldn’t wait for her year and a day to be over so we could initiate her and get her on her path and out of our lives. I know that sounds terrible, but I was very honest with her. I told her that she just didn’t seem to be thriving with us so once her initiation was done, she would be free to see other witches.

So, the day of her initiation came and I was determined to give her a good one. I didn’t want my personal feelings to interfere with her experience. I felt strongly that Chango was going to be involved, although I wasn’t sure why. He hadn’t shown much interest in her until now. I collected leaves of the China Berry tree, which is strongly connected to Chango.

During her ceremony, I took the bunch of leaves, wet them, and briskly wiped her down as a cleansing. I can’t tell why Chango led me to do this at the time, although I later found out this is common in multiple cultures as a cleansing ritual. When it was all over with, she was very upset. She claimed that by touching her with the leaves, I had caused her a great deal of pain. This was interesting because in the year and half we had known her she never mentioned that tidbit. She went on to explain that spirituality should never be painful. We were dumb founded. Not painful? Are you kidding me? I wanted to give her this long diatribe on cultures and systems throughout the world that would torture their initiates and your complaining because I wiped you down with a few leaves?

I then had to remind myself that you can’t fix stupid and sent her on her way. Chango was probably laughing the whole time.

I now require that I get to know people for a year and a day before accepting them as a student. More than once, this has paid off because the candidates have either left, lost interest or showed their true colors.

Sometimes you learn truth from the people you don’t like more than the people you like.

The Chicken Man

2010-04-08T19:28:00.000-07:00

I’ve been following the case of the spiritual guru that killed a couple of his students in the sweat lodge incident in Sedona, Az. For those of you who haven’t been there, Sedona is a beautiful area, nestled in the the red rock formations between Phoenix and Flagstaff. There is a large community of new ager’s that live and work there. Unfortunately, there are some very unscrupulous people selling snake oil there too.

The sweat lodge story reminded me of my first trip to Sedona. I had actually never been there until I was 28, when I went on a trip with my family.

Now, let me preface this story with, I can get pretty new agey myself and I am not against spiritual seeking myself. By the time I got to Sedona, I had been a priestess for several years and I am very good at feeling energy, especially earth energies. So, I was very excited to be going to this new age mecca and feel the vortex energies I had heard so much about.

We arrived in Sedona and went to the vortex closest to our hotel. There was a bunch of spiritual tourists there and everybody was talking about this vortex energy. Unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling jack shit. I tried really hard but I got nothing. As I’m standing there trying my best to feel even a whisper of energy, a man in a chicken hat walks by with three little old ladies trailing behind him. Chicken man was wearing a ridiculous cowboy hat covered in multicolored feathers. I almost pissed myself laughing! And there were 3 little biddies (“the flock”) who were following him around hanging on to every freakin’ word.

Chicken man was “lecturing” his flock about the power of the vortexes and how they will cure everything from a hangnail to hemorrhoids. According to chickenman, the vortexes had the power to fuel your car, unclog your drain and clean your cat’s litter box. With every word he uttered, I was having a harder and harder time not just losing it. Keep in mind this whole time I’m not feeling anything. After a couple of minutes of this, I had to leave and go back to the car. As I was leaving, my mom asked my why I was leaving and all I could do was point and laugh.

So here this guy is, selling the flock a complete line of crap, and I all I can think is how much those ladies probably paid him for the service.

How much do dyed feathers cost anyway? I think I’ve got an old cowboy hat in the closet somewhere.=)

Karmic Balance in a World of Facebook

2010-04-07T16:39:00.000-07:00

Like many people, I’ve been able to reconnect with old friends and acquaintances on Facebook. This weekend, I reconnected with an old friend to whom I owed an apology.

A few years ago, I had an epiphany that there were four people I needed to track down and apologize to and with the help of the internet, I was able to do just that. It was a very liberating experience and one of those people was my sister and now we have a close relationship. Over the years, I’ve come up with a few more names of people that I should say I’m sorry to if I ever get the chance.

“Kandi” was one of those people. We were very good friends once and then had a falling out. In the end, I was a complete bitch to her (more than I had a right to be) and I’ve felt bad about the situation. I don’t know what made me look for her, but I did and much to my surprise she accepted my friend request. I was able to apologize and she accepted graciously.

I used to live my life with the idea that when I left a place, I would probably never see those people again. The internet and social media has changed all of that. Unless someone drops dead, the odds are much higher that you may run into someone or they may look you up. Either way, does this have the possibility of having a positive affect on our karma?

The Jews have this concept of atonement that involves of making amends to the people you have wronged. The digital age had made that easier then ever. As the digital world shrinks the geographic size of our communities, will that force us to resolve past hurts? Or better yet, be less likely to hurt people at all?

Yeah, I don’t think so, but it has helped in my case. Kandi and I may never be as close as we once were, but at least I’ve had a chance to tell her I was wrong and know that she is okay.

The rest of the coffee story

2010-04-06T05:37:00.000-07:00

So several days last week, my regular coffee gas station had been closed so I had to go to my alternate coffee gas station. On Friday, I stopped by Starbucks and paid over $4.00 for coffee, essentially clearing my free coffee karma (whew!). Since the gas station was closed, I thought maybe they had fired the free coffee girl which might have explained the free coffee.

I stopped by at a normal hour on Saturday (after my workout) for coffee and there was a note on the door when I went in that said they would now be closing overnight. I got my coffee, paid for it (yeah!) and I asked the day girl if it was a temporary closing or permanent. She said it was probably permanent because they weren't making enough money.

So I have to wonder at this point, did the girl give me free coffee cause she knew that she wasn't going to be working that shift long or did the profits suddenly drop so drastically (because of my free refills) that they decided to change their whole business model? Could go either way.

Another good plant day.

2010-04-03T18:40:00.000-07:00

So I went to the farmer's market this morning and it was crazy busy. This made me happy even though I was having trouble finding parking. The vegetables looked fantastic. I picked up some broccoli, swiss chard, spinach, green onions, carrots, lettuce.

At some point, I lost my mind and picked up brussel sprouts. I hated these things as a kid but then I again my mom served the frozen, out of the bag kind. I've been told by several people that cooking fresh ones yourself are delicious

I told my sister about them, she was stunned.

I also picked up a sweet basil and a chive plant.

Later on in the day, I went back to the nursery and rounded out the plant gardem with thyme, golden sage, celery, spicy wild greens and fernleaf lavender. I love fernleaf lavender because you get terrific lavender sent through the leaves. I also replaced my lone casualty, a rosemary plant.

I called my friend Rosemary and yelled at her for the sins of "her people."

The nursery was also super busy. They have an extensive garden of their own that they allow you to take pictures of so I think I will take my camera next time.

I still have some potting soil left, I think I'm gonna have to pick up a few more plants.

Ladybugs are invading my life!

2010-04-02T17:16:00.000-07:00

I don’t know if it’s coincidence or providence ( "I do not see coincidence, I see providence."-Morpheus) but it seems that my lady bugs have invaded my life.

A couple weeks ago, I went a local favorite nursery of mine to buy some starter plants. They are right next door to a local compost producing company…let’s call them company X. I had several other errands to run so I was in a bit of a hurry and didn’t want to make a second stop so I went ahead and purchased their potting soil. Much to my surprise, they didn’t carry company x potting soil anymore, they carried Lady Bug brand potting soil instead. She swore up and down that it was great stuff and I went ahead and purchased a bag. Mainly ‘cause I like lady bugs. I like them a lot.

I didn’t get out of the driveway before I called my good buddy Nathan, who used to work for company X. I told him my experience at the nursery and he was not surprised. He told me that company X’s quality had detoriated since going corporate and a lot of people were unhappy with it. He agreed with the sales lady at the nursery that the lady bug brand was great stuff and I should be happy with it.

On Wednesday, a co-worker and I were walking on our lunch break and we found a some Thistles covered in lady bugs. Yeah! Lady bugs! Did I mention I like lady bugs?

This morning, at about 6:45 am, I discovered a lady bug in my car after I parked it for work. I have no idea how she got there but I got her on my hand and was trying to free her but she refused to leave my hand. This is quite odd because lady bugs normally don’t tend to stay on my hand for very long.

We only worked a half day today (due to it being Good Friday) and when I was walking out of the building at noon, a lady bug bopped me on the head. I finally got the hint…I think the lady bugs are trying to tell me something.

When I got home, I grabbed a Ted Andrews book off the shelf (“Animal-wise”) and looked up the lady bug. According to Mr. Andrews, lady bugs herald a time of good luck, protection and wishes being fulfilled. Woohoo! There was also a warning about doing too much so I’m going be careful about overextending myself.

Did I mention I like lady bugs?

Pan (pt II)

2010-03-31T19:23:00.000-07:00

Pan showed up a couple of weeks ago. Now that we've gotten to know each other better, I'ld like to add some more information.

First off, Pan doesn't like excuses. He can be quite the task-master and is driving me pretty hard. I've got a really busy agenda and I'm doing my best to stick to it 'cause i can feel him over my shoulder.

Next, Pan is not a fan of the TV. He doesn't mind having music playing but he's guiding me to turn the TV off if I'm not watching something in particular. He's really not into alot of talking and prefers actions to words...just shut up and do it already.

Pan is also filthy. He loves dirty jokes and some of the most awful thoughts have come out of my mouth the last couple of weeks (some of which weren't from my head).

He prefers the bedroom wombish and dark. My husband isn't a fan but even he has admitted we've both been sleeping so much better since I put two dark blankets up on the bedroom walls. Not only are we sleeping better, but we've both been having LOTS of dreams.

With Pan, I've been working really hard at connecting with my new patio garden plants. I am able to feel them more but I will continue working in that direction. My chamomile, fennel, mint and lettuce plants all seem really happy. BTW-fennel likes it when you breathe on it.

I definitely need to get out into some woods this weekend.

Thanksgiving and Cooking for Morons

2010-03-30T17:07:00.000-07:00

I didn’t really cook until I was 29. Before that my rule was if it took more than five steps I didn’t cook it (and opening the can was a step).

That being said, my mother is a fantastic cook and so I at least know what good food is supposed to taste like. My cooking career began with a Thanksgiving dinner. For my first Thanksgiving dinner here in Texas, we went over to a friend’s house (like always). Having spent the holiday before at my Mom’s house, I was very disappointed in the food. It was so nasty I just couldn’t eat anything.

I got back to the house thinking I just can’t do another bad Thanksgiving dinner. I spoke to my mom about it and she wrote up six pages of instructions for my very own turkey dinner. The next year I made my own Thanksgiving dinner. It took 7 hours and dirtied every dish that I owned but the food was GOOD. Real good.

My next cooking adventure when my boyfriend at the time starting grilling. He was fantastic on the grill but lousy in the kitchen. He was creating works of art for the meat but serving it with terrible side dishes. I picked up the cooking for morons book he had purchased, kicked him out of the kitchen and a foodie was born.

I don't know if it's genetics or upbringing but I cook like my mother. Throw some stuff in a pot, add lots of flavor and recipes are for pusscakes. Okay, I followed a recipe once. I didn't like it. The only problem with that method of cooking is when people asked me how I made the dish I get a blank look on my face..."um...I don't know...I just cooked it." Not very useful instructions.

So more than a decade later, I cook a lot. I love cooking for my family and friends. I get such enjoyment from being able to whip up something tasty & delicious…food is love after all. Thanksgiving is especially important. I have found memories of the food at Thanksgiving when I was a kid, and now I get to pass that on to my children.

I heart Itunes

2010-03-28T16:42:00.000-07:00

I am addicted to Itunes.

There, I've said it. And no, I don't want to join a support group.

I love Itunes more than I loved two of my three husbands. Okay, to be fair, I love athlete's foot more than I loved two of my three husbands.

Itunes is fabulous. Not only can you spend hours searching for music but it has the best recommendation feature I have yet to come across. It will recommend a long list of songs to you and you have the ability to tell it you hate it. Watch and learn Facebook!

I used to spend quite a bit of money on cd's. I used to have tons of cd's that I bought for one song only. Then, as a starving student, I discovered a wonderful used bookstore chain we have here called Half Priced books and I would spend lots of time and somewhat less money scouring their racks for used music. Then I discovered Itunes and never looked back.

My strategy is this: 1. Any holiday in which someone (to whom I am not married to) asks me what they can get me for said holiday, I respond with "an Itunes gift card." 2. Every month, $10.00 of my budget is dedicated to Itunes. 3. At the end of the month, if I have more than $100.00 in my bank account, then I can go spend another $10.00 at Itunes.

So, you are probably thinking that's not so bad right? And it's not, accept I've been doing this for more than 5 years now. Add my monthly budget to all of the gift cards I received over the years and that means I have bought over a thousand songs. I'm really not exaggerating.

Did I mention I LOVE music. LOVES it!

Not only do I have lots of new music, but when I split from hubby #1, I lost a ton of cd's that through the magic of Itunes I have been able to get back. And I have some pretty wide ranging tastes. Rock, pop, punk, country, new-age/world, classical, R&B, dance, 80's, Hawai'ian death metal jazz, you name the genre and I probably have bought a song or two.

There are actually two songs I have not been able to find on Itunes. The first is a cover of the song "Ain't gonna eat out my heart" by the Divinyls. It appeared on the soundtrack for the movie Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The second is "Rooms for the Memory" by Michael Hutchence off the Dogs in Space Soundtrack. Dogs in Space is a movie that came out in 1986 that like 3 people in the world have seen and I am one of them. I own the soundtrack on tape cassette but the cd (when you can find them) go for crazy amounts of money...the kind of money that would take away from my Itunes budget and we just can't have that.

No more free coffee!

2010-03-27T18:28:00.000-07:00

I am a creature of habit. Every morning I buy my coffee from the same gas station (bite me Starbucks). I’ve scouted every establishment on my route and I have settled on the one that has the best quality coffee, hottest temperature and the flavor of creamer I like. Oddly enough, they are also one of the cheapest…go figure.

So, all of that being said, I’ve been happy with this particular gas station for sometime now until this week. The regular overnight guy is no longer there (don’t know yet if he left or is on vacation) and there’s a new gal in his place.

On Monday morning, I go in and get my coffee refill and the new lady is kinda busy doing something and tells me I can have it for free. This does happen on occasion when the clerk is busy and doesn’t want to stop what they are doing for a coffee refill. I say thank you and get on the road.

Tuesday morning, I approach the register with my dollar in my hand and she tells me I can have my refill for free, again. I leave confused ‘cause she wasn’t busy and I had my dollar. Okay, I decided that on Wednesday morning, I would pay for my coffee and give a dollar to a charity thing they got going on there.

Wednesday morning, I have my coffee and my two dollars in my hand and quicker than anything, she tells gives it to me for free. I said no, it’s okay but she insisted.

I worked from home on Thursday so I made my own coffee but I brought it up to my husband. As my partner and my life-mate he wanted to be supportive but as an accountant he was confused as to why I was complaining. I told him that it was making me feel creepy. He suggested that on Friday I buy something along with my coffee. I thought this was a brilliant idea.

Friday morning, I purchase a Nutrigrain bar and my coffee refill. Hah! I’ve got her now…she is going to be forced to charge me! She rings up the Nutrigrain bar but not the coffee refill. AHHH! Son of a biscuit! You may have won this battle free coffee lady but you will not win the war!

I’ve come up with three equally plausible scenarios:
1. She was badly trained and she doesn’t actually know where the coffee refill button is located on the register.
2. She actually hates the company she works for and is trying to slowly bankrupt them one coffee refill at a time.
3. She thinks I’m cute.

Frankly, that last one bothers me ‘cause while I don’t put butter on that side of my pancake, I would be flattered if she was cute…but she AIN’T cute.

A co-worker suggested that I actually forget my cup on Monday and pay full price for coffee and see if that forces her hand.

I’ll keep y’all posted on the results.

Embracing My Fun

2010-03-25T17:15:00.000-07:00

I was thinking to myself last night how strange it feels to be an adult. I’m going to be 40 years old in a couple of months and I don’t feel like a grown-up. How is it that I still listen to my 80’s music, watch Southpark and giggle at poop jokes but yet I’m a professional at work and provide adult supervision to my wonderful step-children?

Do other people my age feel this way? Did my parents feel this way? Has this always been this way?

Both my husband and I are very responsible people. We pay our bills, take care of our family, pets, plants, job responsibilities and our gods but yet we both still have fun and play. Neither of us can remember our parents having a lot of fun. Is that normal? Did our parents say the same thing about their parents? Did Mr & Mrs Caveman sit around their cave wondering why they seemed to have more fun then their parents?

Will this ever go away? I look around at the friends I have my age and they all seem to be fully in touch with their inner child. Are we going to be senior citizens playing video games with our grandchildren, reading Harry Potter and planning for the zombie-pocalypse? I hear the Wii is a huge hit with the over-60 crowd these days so who knows…Will they make game controllers with larger buttons and call it the Jitterbug for the PS15?

IT”S SPRING!!!

2010-03-24T17:10:00.000-07:00

One of the things I love about this time of year is the bloom of the Texas Redbuds. Within the last 2 weeks, the Redbuds have just exploded with flowers here in Central Texas and since pink is my favorite color, this makes me very happy.

The Texas Redbud, a small tree native to this area, produces a beautiful pink flower prior to leafing out. In full bloom, a Redbud is very showy and stands out for quite a distance. It serves as a wonderful announcement of spring.

The tree itself has a warm, inviting energy. The bright pink flowers are edible and have a slightly sweet flavor to them.

On my webpage, I link the Texas Redbud to the Pomba Gira. If you have ever met any of these ladies, you would know that they never enter a room quietly. They want banners flying, horns blowing and strobe lights flashing when they show up. The Redbud tree is the exact same way, she announces spring with loud music and jazz hands.

Can't we all just get along?

2010-03-23T18:10:00.000-07:00

My intent when I started this blog was for it to be spiritual, not political. There are lots of blogs out there dedicated to politics and the world probably doesn't need another one.

That being said, something interesting happened today that I just want to share.

Yesterday, at the gym at work, 2 men were having quite the loud conversation about the health insurance bill that just got passed. Their tone was horribly disrespectful and so shockingly negative that I had to get myself out of there before I started screaming at them.

To be fair, yes, I am a left-leaning Democrat but I have many friends, family and acquaintances who lean the other direction and we are normally able to carry on serious political discussions like civilized people.

So, this morning, in my office, 2 older gentlemen that I work with started having a similar conversation, although their tone wasn't nearly as disrespectful. This time I couldn't run because it was my office.

I let this go on awhile before finally explaining my own personal experience. I told them that I was recently diagnosed with a serious health issue that had gone undiagnosed because for the five years I was a graduate student, I couldn't afford health insurance. I then told them that because my condition was undiagnosed and therefore untreated, it has probably shortened my lifespan. I then went on to explain that due to this condition, I will probably not be able to get health insurance coverage and unless something changes, I will have to stay with my current employer, whether I want to or not.

Both men went on to explain how they had family members with similar stories.

I asked both of the men if the had ever heard anyone talk about how much they loved their health insurance and both men said "no."

I then said, so we can all agree that the current system is terrible and needs to be fixed, we just don't agree on how it should be done. They both said "yes."

At that point, the two gentlemen quickly changed the subject. Maybe they were afraid I was going to ask a follow-up question like "So how should we go about fixing it?"

A Hawai’ian Heart

2010-03-23T17:12:00.000-07:00

Several months ago, I participated in the Reiki initiation of a friend of mine. My friend just happens to be Hawai’ian. During his initiation, several Hawai’ian deities showed up and a couple hung out for several weeks afterwards. One of those individuals was Hina, the goddess of the moon.

Hina is one of the ancestral goddesses of the Hawaiian people. She is queen of the female goddesses (akua) and watches over pregnant women and childbirth. Besides her connection to the moon, Hina is also connected with cloth making, the island of Moloka’i, the sea and medicines from the sea. She is often described as a very beautiful, smart and determined young woman who is pursued by men and other creatures. She has many forms including a coral reef and the leaves of the limu kala seaweed. Hina is normally linked with the god Ku and her yin nature often balances his yang.

Hina immediately grabbed a hold of me and spent the next several days working on my heart chakra. It was like I could feel her delicate fingers actually inside my chest cavity messaging my heart. This means, of course, that I spent about week crying for no reason.

Due to pain I suffered when I was younger, my heart chakra has always been a weak spot. I’ve worked on it through the years with limited success but she was able to heal more scar tissue in a few days than I have in a couple of decades. The interesting part of this story is I lived in Hawai’i when I was in my 20’s and spent 2-1/2 of the most peaceful years of my life there. I don’t think it was an accident that a goddess from Hawai’i helped me find a little more peace.

I’ve continued working on my heart chakra and whenever I have trouble getting that chakra to open, I just call on Hina. Other then my sincere gratitude, Hina asked for nothing in return so I have tried to share her spirit by performing chakra-healing work on other people.

The Zen of Migraines or How I Learned to Love Kale.

2010-03-22T17:18:00.000-07:00

I used to suffer from severe migraines. At my worst, I would get 6-8 a month, and it was not uncommon for them to be so bad they would cause me to vomit. I suffered through them for years before finally getting them diagnosed. I didn’t even know that they migraines until I was at the doctor’s office for a physical when I had a major migraine going on and I fell over during the eye exam. The doctor put me on some pretty good meds that took away the pain but left me groggy.

After some research, I figured out that consuming large amounts of dairy products was a contributing factor so I switched to soy milk and greatly reduced my cheese intake. That reduced the migraines to 2 or 3 a month and frankly, I was happy with that.

Five years ago, my mate and I got memberships to our local gym. We incorporated regular exercise into our lives and I was surprised that regular exercise (3-5 times a week) reduced the frequency of my migraines even more, about 1 a month on average.

Over a year ago, I was diagnosed with a certain type of kidney disease. As part of my treatment for this I have had to change over to a diet low in protein (especially animal protein), greatly reduce my salt intake, eat lots of fresh fruits, vegetables and whole grains and pretty much eliminate fast food out of my diet. I can’t have any alcohol or ibuprofen and I have to get lots of exercise. And guess what…my migraines are gone, completely. Like I haven’t had one in over 6 months.

Apparently, all of the things that were causing them to begin with were the same things that I now need to do for myself and my kidneys. Isn’t funny how everything works out sometimes?

This last weekend, I was throwing a bit of a food tantrum and ate some stuff on Saturday I shouldn’t have. Sunday morning I woke up with the beginnings of a migraine. That gave me such a jolt that I immediately threw out the leftover bad stuff in the fridge and begged the health gods and my body for forgiveness.

Go vegetables!

Be very afraid.

2010-03-21T19:51:00.000-07:00

This is face of true evil. He is Bouncer T. Kitty, Darth "Boo," the Dark Lord and Emperor of all he surveys (including the porch and the back yard and the fence that seperates this complex from the one next door).

He will stalk you like wild game under the darkness of cover, pounce on you like a fat kid on a cupcake, sink his sharp teeth into your ankle like a tiger killing a gazelle and run away like the little bitch that he is to get out of butt-swatting distance and mock your ability to bleed profusely.

He will also meow loudly at you for no reason whatsoever. He will hide anything small and valuable. He will poop in your shoe.

This is the face of true evil. Don't let the little pink ball fool you.

Hunt for the Alarm Clock Bird

2010-03-21T14:57:00.000-07:00

Everyone has an arch nemesis; a mortal enemy if you will. James Bond had Dr. No, Superman had Lex Luthor, SpongeBob has Plankton and my husband has the alarm clock bird.

My husband (let's call him Greg) has many names for the alarm clock bird ("ACB") and most of them are not repeatable. Two years ago, we moved from the front of our apartment complex to the back. We needed a larger apartment and we were tired of being next door to the pool. For the most part, this side of the complex is quieter, except for the ACB.

The alarm clock bird wakes up at dawn every single morning and has a high-pitched call that consists of a series of three loud notes in rapid succession. Apparently the ACB's call is at the exact pitch and timbre to drill directly into Greg's brain and wake him up instantly, pissing him off to no end.

Now, I don't want you to get the wrong idea, my husband loves all animals and nature and he is not a violent guy however he has put out a hit on the ACB. He promised our cat the large can of t-u-n-a if he killed the alarm clock bird. The cat has so far not been interested in the deal so my husband suspects the cat may now be working as a double agent. Perhaps the ACB is a nip dealer on the side.

Anyway, Greg has been trying to figure out what species this bird belongs to (although he was almost certain the genus name started with the f-word) and we may finally have an answer. Greg caught site of an LBB (Little Brown Bird) the other day and after some investigation, the alarm clock bird maybe a Carolina Wren. Now that he knows what he is up against, he might finally be able kill the little bastard and get some sleep.

Chickweed

2010-03-20T12:43:00.000-07:00

Several years ago, I got serious about working with plant spirits. I was able to make contact with several plant spirits including: honey mesquite, hackberry, lavender and chickweed.

Chickweed, Stellaria media, is a annual plant that thrives in cool weather. It creates mats and has small white, star-shaped flowers. Edible and nutritious, chickweed is often eaten in salads. There was a large mat of chickweed growing next to the apartment we lived in at the time so finding living chickweed wasn't an issue.

My first contact with the spirit of chickweed actually made my finger tingle for several minutes. I remember her (she felt feminine) hanging around for a couple of days. She had a airy, nuturing feel to her. The impression I got from chickweed was that she could help support a person (nutritionally and emotionally) as they face difficult times. I believe the energy of this plant can help you find your destiny. She was a very friendly spirit.

Like many people in the area, I lost a lot of plants this winter due to the weather so I have begun clearing out the dead plants to make way for the new. Imagine my surprise when I found bunches of chickweed in three different pots. I don't know how she got there but I'm gonna try to keep her going in at least one of the pots. Maybe this is the plant kingdom sending me some support in the form of a friendly star-shaped face.

The Goddess and the Riverwalk

2010-03-19T17:04:00.000-07:00

I moved to San Antonio because both Oshun and I fell in love with the riverwalk.

I had come to San Antonio over a decade ago to visit a friend on my way back home. While I was here, my friend and I visited the the Alamo and the Riverwalk in downtown San Antonio. For those of you who haven't been lucky enough to visit our fair city, San Antonio was founded over 300 years ago on the banks of the San Antonio River. The city grew up around the river. In the 1930's, development of the banks of the river itself began. Pedestrian only walkways with lush trees, waterfalls, fountains and landscapes were created. Many waterfowl (ducks, geese, egrets, etc) reside at the riverwalk. There are also bars, restaurants and lots of shopping. Now our famous riverwalk is a gorgeous paradise 1 story beneath our downtown area that gets visited by millions every year.

So, to recap...river+nature+partying+shopping=Oshun. Her and I immediately fell in love with the Riverwalk area and a 18 months later, we moved here for good.

With all that being said, whenever the mood strikes or I have company come to town, I head down to the Riverwalk. As many times as I have been down there, I am still amazed at how strongly the goddess energy flows through the area. Oya, as the breeze that constantly blows through the area; Nana, as the stately Bald Cypresses that stand peacefully by the river; Ochumare, who loves the tickle of the waterfalls; Yemaya, at the several popular marriage spots and Oshun herself, meandering through absorbing all of the fun.

Some out of town friends and I went downtown a couple of weeks ago, to shop and see the sites. While we at La Villata, I noticed a quiet little pray spot close to the bead store. There was a carving of the Virgin of Guadalupe in the recess of the wall that surrounds La Villata. I had to giggle because she seemed perfectly at home there, along with the rest of the goddesses.

Pan

2010-03-18T18:05:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I had a chance to chat with Baron Samedi and I asked him if he was related to the Greek god Pan. Both the Baron and Pan have strong shamanistic ties and a deep-earth energy. Baron certainly deals with people more than Pan but both have their connections to death and the subconscious mind. They also invoke similar feelings in me…they make me horny and sleepy. Both entities are connected with nature, sex and the cycle of life…you know, the uncontrollable wild things that frighten us most.

Anyway, Baron replied that they are of the same wind. I thought that phrase was so beautiful that I had to immediately write it down. We are of the same wind. Oh my, that is poetic.

I never thought much about Pan until I read the book, the Findhorn Garden. In the book, Robert O. Crombie (“Roc”) tells of an encounter with Pan that greatly influenced his (and my) life. It’s hard to think about Pan without recalling the energy I felt when I first ventured into the plant spirit path. Many people talk to their plants but few of us wait to hear an answer. Unlike Roc, I have yet to have a conversation with Pan but I can feel him in the silent forest, when the smell of earth is thick. Pan smells like compost.

Pan is of the old, silent chthonic energies, the type of energy that really scares people. I never experienced true silence until I found myself alone in a thick German forest. The type of silence only allows for deep introspection and some find that silence to be terrifying. I admit, as I have gotten older I have more appreciation for silence.

While I enjoy walking around in any form of nature, I can only sense Pan in the forest. We are lucky in Central Texas that we don’t have to drive too far to find some woods. However, as development increases, we are left with fewer and fewer patches of woodland forest, pushing Pan further and further away from us. I seem to recall in the Findhorn Garden that in traditional gardens a part of the garden would be (and should be) left wild and undisturbed. This is probably to leave space for the wild things.

Leave space for the wild things. I think I’m gonna make that my new motto for life.

The Irish Orisha

2010-03-17T18:12:00.000-07:00

Most of my students study more than one spiritual system. I’m not gonna call it a requirement but I certainly encourage it.

Now with that being said, I have one priestess, Amber, who has only learned the Orisha based systems. Chango is her father and the running joke is when you ask Amber for spiritual advice the answer is always the same. Chango. Feelin’ blue? Chango. Pimples? Chango. Broke? Chango. Hangnail? You guessed it, Chango.

A couple of weeks ago, Amber called and told me that she had some new Orisha show up in her life and was speaking directly to her. She then said that this Orisha was 6’4” tall, Irish, with red hair and red beard and a pretty thick Irish accent. I then explained to her that I really didn’t think she was talking to an Orisha. She was kinda confused at that point as to why an Irish god was speaking to her. It took a while to convince her that the world was a great big place inhabited by lots of different folks. She decided at that point she was just gonna call him the “Irish Orisha.” I can confirm at this point that he found her to be quite amusing and was in fact, laughing at her.

After some detective work and several phone conversations later, we were able to identify the Irish Orisha as Miach, son of Dian Cecht. Miach has a fantastic sense of humor and is a lot of fun, especially considering his story does not end well. His dad offed him in a fit of jealousy because Miach was the better healer. Miach was wearing a short, sleeveless white shirt with leather cuffs around both arms which showed off his hairy chest. Amber also described him as having an intense face with bright green eyes. Oh, and he loves the lesbians. Amber knows many lesbians so she suspected that may be how he ended up at her house.

So, in honor of all of the Irish Gods, Goddesses and Orishas out there, Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Random thoughts about spring and bad manners.

2010-03-16T17:16:00.000-07:00

I've spent a couple of decades following my spiritual path and yet I still want to choke the life out of the woman in front of me in line at the grocery store because she was too busy reading the tabloids then to put her freakin' groceries up on the conveyor belt. Is that wrong?

Seriously. Would it have killed her to take some precious moments away from her what-is-tiger-woods-doing-now reading time to get her crap in place so the rest of us could move on with our evening?

Does this make me a bad person? I don't know. Is it better to think evil thoughts about a person than to ram my cart into her obnoxious butt accidentally on purpose three or four hundred times until my arms cramped up? Not sure.

Anyway, on a happier note, spring has sprung here in South Central Texas and everybody seems to be feeling it. It seems that everyone I know is planting something for a garden or getting out more or cleaning out the clutter in his or her life. This year it actually feels like spring. We should have a bumper crop of spring flowers this season so besides replanting my herb patio garden I also gonna try to get some great pics this season.

On the bright side, my cat is now trying to drive me crazy. Occasionally, he will start meowing very loudly at me and when I stop what I'm doing and run over to see what is wrong with him he looks at me is if I'm crazy. Last night, he came into the bathroom while I was trying to take a shower and started up again. I pull the curtain to see what was wrong and he would just stare at me with that vacant look. I would close the curtain to get on with my shower and then he would do it again. AHHHH!!!

Maybe he's in cahoots with the woman at the grocery store. Maybe there is a conspiracy out there to drive me bonkers and I am afraid it may be working.

icanhaspunishmentz

2009-10-07T18:40:00.000-07:00

Recently, 2 friends of mine got into a bit of a tiff because friend A (Amanda) didn't tell friend B (Elizabeth) something really IMPORTANT. While Amanda had apologized to Elizabeth, Elizabeth was really upset about the breech of trust and Amanda felt really bad for hurting Elizabeth.

Enter me. I relayed the following story to Elizabeth:
Several years ago, my accountant boyfriend (now husband) really hurt my feelings. Even though I had accepted his apology, he still felt terrible and informed me that he needed to be punished. At first I laughed until I realized he was serious. So I came up with the harshest punishment I could. I told him he couldn't check any of his bank account balances for three weeks.

Did I mention that he's an accountant? The man who gets up every single morning and checks his account and calls the bank if it is 1 penny off couldn't look at his account.

For three weeks. Three longs weeks.

He did it and frankly now neither one of us can remember what he did in the first place, although we both remember the "punishment."

Anyway, I relayed this story to Elizabeth and suggested that she might come up with some sort of similar punishment for Amanda so they could both feel better. I also suggested the punishment. Amanda couldn't look at her favorite website for one week.

That's right, one whole week without...

http://icanhascheezburger.com/

Oh, the horror.

Amanda was very sad, but she agreed to it.

It was a long, hard, joyless week but she did it. My husband felt so bad for her that he made these terrible hand-sketched drawings of several pics off the site and gave her one a day to hold her over.

Now both friends seem to have moved on with their lives and friendship.

When we hurt someone close to us, even if they forgive us, we may still feel terrible. Karmically, we need to learn from our mistakes and forgive ourselves. By willingly accepting their punishment, my man and Amanda were able to show that they were really sorry about hurting someone they cared about and how deeply their commitment to their loved ones was.

I won't speak for Amanda, but my husband was able to forgive himself and let it go so we could both move on. Who can ask for more than that?

The Spiritual Rollercoaster

2009-10-02T16:59:00.000-07:00

It's funny have everything runs in cycles. The last few months I've dealt with tons of life-drama including the house my step-children lived in burning down, a close relative getting into a bad relationship and crazy drama at work. Then a couple weeks ago, like a light switch being turned off, all the life drama stops and the spiritual fastlane begins.

My whole group seems to have hit the down slope on the rollercoaster at the exact same moment. It's time likes this that I keep my emergency tarot deck with me at all times and a spell-casting crash kit by the front door.

As many times as this cycle seems to repeat itself, I'm always amazed at how it seems the entire universe can be in cahoots in making sure we live in interesting times. While these fast periods certainly make for some great stories, it also all too easy to lose your way. It's makes it all the more important to have in tune/well grounded people around you to reign you in when you've gone too far.

I've noticed that some deities especially like the "hot" season (yes Chango-I'm talking about you). However, some will move to the back and wait for things to cool down again before making their presence known. There's also a danger that messages and dreams will start coming so fast that you can't keep up, so I tell my students to write everything down so you can try to make sense of it later.

Well, maybe I'll get some sleep come New Year's.

My Funny Valentine

2009-02-20T19:52:00.000-08:00

So, I’ve done a lot of reading through the years. I’ve read some great books and some not great books. While there is some wonderful information out there, what seems to be missing about the gods/goddesses in general is that they have terrific senses of humor. They are not just funny... seriously, they are freakin’ hilarious. Not that you want to laugh AT them but you should definitely laugh WITH them. And I’m not talking about just the tricksters either, they are all pretty funny.

The worst thing that we can do is take ourselves too seriously. I believe this when people are most likely to make dumb choices. If you get too hung up on yourself, the gods will start poking at you to get you over yourself.

A long time ago (in a place far, far away) I was involved in a Dianic Wiccan coven. The high priestess took herself VERY seriously. We weren’t able to wear certain colors because those were her colors. There were certain types of feathers we couldn’t put on our robes because those birds belonged to her. The worst was the owl. Owls were her totem animal and belonged to her and only her and don’t let her catch you having anything owlish in her circle.

So, the coven had arranged this big midsummer ritual out on a local popular beach and had even managed to get some press for it. We were going out there to put on a show for the public. We had a great spot on the beach (under a grove of trees) and we were all dressed up in our witchy finest and all was going well…until about halfway through the ritual when an enormous owl took a major shit on her head. Oh. My. Gods. I almost peed myself trying not to laugh (I was new to the game and was trying not to get thrown out of the circle).

The high priestess tried to play it off while explaining it was good luck when an animal relieved themselves on you. Really? Good luck? If my totem animal took a gigantic crap on me I would have to re-evaluate my lifestyle and immediately start making amends for whatever I did to piss off the universe.

Bless her heart, she finished the ritual with this disgusting bird crap dripping off of her crown. Thank gods it was dark and a large circle and nobody could see me crying from holding back the giggles.

Sometimes, the gods will send messages in funny ways or the message itself will be funny.

A few months ago, one of my priestesses had just had Baron Samedi show up in her life. He was sending her a lot of weird dreams and I was starting to get used to the frequent phone calls to decode them. One night she called in a panic, wanting to know what connection the Baron had to bologna. “Bologna? What on earth are you talking about? I’ve never heard of a connection…Why?” I asked. She then begins to tell me about this dream she had where the Baron had hid some bologna in her bedroom and she was running around frantic trying to find it.

I started laughing really hard and the more she tried to explain the harder I laughed. Finally, she stopped and demanded that I tell her what was so funny. I said “You know like hide the sausage…the Baron was playing hide the bologna with you in your bedroom.” She started to laugh, too. My guess was that she was probably needing a piece of bologna in her life.

A Date with Chango

2009-01-24T17:28:00.000-08:00

What Chango is best at is lighting a fire under our proverbial tushes and get us moving. Chango is the fire in our bellies, the spark that makes us want to get up off the couch and do something.

Chango showed up in my life full force 6 days after my first husband left me for an ugly woman. I was in total shock and disbelief. I felt alone, fat and ugly. In my worst moment, Chango sent “Matt.” Matt was several years younger than me, fun, full of life and great in the sack. He was Irish with bright red hair and played in a band. I had met Matt a few weeks before the break-up and as soon as he found out I was single, he called.

Frankly, this child of Chango was exactly what I needed at that moment to make me feel special. It only lasted six weeks (alas, Matt had a temper and frankly wasn’t very bright) but the relationship served its purpose. My spiritual light had been rekindled and I felt like a girl again.

Chango has the ability to make us feel alive again so that we don’t wallow in our own personal swamp hell. He sparks our inner spirit until we have enough energy to sustain our own inner fire.

The energy that rekindled my spiritual life is the same energy that makes a 40 year old man suddenly buy a Corvette, grow a pony tail and start dating 20 year olds. Feeling alive takes many manifestations. While I’m not gonna knock the Corvette, I do recommend channeling more of that energy inwards and less into screwing 20 year olds.

Chango’s energy is not permanent. Even when I was in my relationship with Matt, I knew it wasn’t permanent. Rebound guy never lasts long but I also knew to enjoy the ride while it lasted.

Every once in a while, Chango shows up full force in my life again. He always comes with a purpose (to give me inspiration, to help me heal, etc.). I know he won’t stick around long but I should enjoy his company while he’s here.

Magickal Cooking

2009-01-18T06:44:00.001-08:00

I have given a lot of offerings over the years and I have found that for me, those offerings that had the best energy were the meals I lovingly made from scratch. In many cultures, food is love and that certainly holds true in my house. Now, anytime you make an offering from scratch, whether it is a meal, a carved trinket or a piece of stained glass, that energy will be felt but today I want to focus on cooking.

I try to tell my students that giving a food offering, whether to one deity or ten, is like throwing a dinner party. When you spend your time and energy making something from scratch, that energy will shine through the finished product. If you invite me over for dinner, open up a can of something and heat it up on the stove, I will be polite but I will not be excited. However, if I walk into your house and smell something tasty that you have spent some real energy on, I’m gonna be very excited about dinner!

Now honestly, I don’t have the time to throw out a big spread for every occasion but I do try to make something nice for a deity’s special day or a big thank you after asking for something huge.

I grew up not wanting to cook. My mother is a fabulous cook but all I wanted to eat was junk food. It wasn’t until I was in my late 20’s that I found myself craving something better. Frankly, I got tired of eating crappy Thanksgiving dinners. I called my mom and asked for help. She sent 6 pages of instructions (that I still have) that covered the basics. It took me seven hours to cook my first Thanksgiving dinner and it wasn’t perfect but it tasted GOOD.

Over time, I realized that it wasn’t just the ingredients themselves that made the difference, but the energy I poured into making it. Not every offering needs to be a Thanksgiving dinner, but every step in the process will add more energy to the total. From the shopping, to the chopping, to the actual cooking, the more that you are involved in the entire process, the more of you will be in the final product.

For us, I firmly believe that homemade food is almost always better than eating out and ALWAYS better than anything in a can. Cooking seems to be becoming a lost art in our society and it’s really a shame. It’s not difficult and I truly believe anybody can learn. I’m not ashamed to admit it, after my wonderful Thanksgiving experience, I picked up a “Cooking for Dummies” and read it cover to cover. I was really busy with school and work at the time, but I tried to incorporate more and more cooking into my daily and spiritual life.

As a side note, I have found that organic products usually have a better energy than normal supermarket produce (and taste better). Also, if you have a farmer’s market available to you, take advantage of it. Produce and other foodstuff sold at those types of local markets are fresher and usually raised and harvested with more love and care than any factory farm could dream. I have also found that fresh herbs usually have stronger energy than dried.

When it comes to the etiquette of offering giving, it’s perfectly okay to make a meal meant for the deities and your family. Just make sure you make enough for everyone and that the gods get the first portion(s). Then feed everyone else.

However you show your love to the gods and goddesses, do it well. Take the time and effort to do it right. We aren’t all going to be gourmet chefs but I can tell you, Babaluaye will certainly appreciate you making a batch of black-eyed peas versus just opening a can…even if you did forget the salt.

Dr. Strangelove: Or How the Orishas Learned to Love I-Tunes.

2009-01-16T10:29:00.000-08:00

Music is very important to the Orishas. Like most cultures, the tribes that practice Orisha worship had their own music, involving drums and chants. The drum beats played in the traditional ceremonies in the New World evolved from the music in Old World. That traditional music is still incredibly important to the Orishas.

However, their modern followers like modern music. Your favorite songs are going to invoke certain emotions within you to which they will respond. Your favorite love song will hit a nerve that Oshun will find attractive. You get an upbeat, drum heavy song that gets you up and moving and Chango is probably going to feel it too.

That being said, if you don’t like a song, whether it’s the traditional beats or that new song by the latest artist, they’re not going to feel your emotional response and it will be lost on you and them. I bought several cds filled with Orisha music and chants and I felt nothing but you put on some New Orleans blues and I can feel several entities pop into my head.

So, I’m gonna go through a list of songs that I have found the Orishas like in my experience. Individual results may very. First off, “Rio” by Duran Duran, Oshun LOVES that song. It comes on the radio and I can almost instantly feel her. Blondie’s “Rapture” is great one. Besides the fact that he’s actually in the video, Baron Samedi adores that song. One of my students, who is a child of the Pomba Gira, tells me that she can feel the Pomba Gira show up when Santana’s “Black Magic Woman” is played.

Enya’s “Orinoco Flow” is a favorite of Yemaya. The song has a wonderful watery feel to it. Eshu is strongly attracted to the Rollons Stones’ “Sympathy for the Devil” (either the original or the Guns-N-Roses remake). There’s a lot of classical music that Obatala likes. He’s always liked “Principles of Lust” by Enigma. I think he likes the Gregorian chanting in it. I get the feeling he also likes the Beatles.

Ellegua likes a lot of different music, including Nirvana, Jimi Hendrix and gangsta rap. Ogoun responds well to heavy metal like Metallica’s “Enter Sandman” and Rob Zombie. Nana Buruku likes a lot of world music and Nine Inch Nails. There is something very primal about NIN’s music which Nana seems to enjoy.

There’s quite a bit of R&B that Chango really likes. If it’s been played in a club and danced to by sweaty, half-naked people, he’s probably shaken his booty to it. Oya seems to like music with a spiritual bent to it, like Madonna’s “Bedtime Stories.” “Goodbye Earl” by the Dixie Chicks is another good song for Oya. (hehehe...)

Whatever music you enjoy, all that’s important is that you have an emotional response to it. Without it, they will (like you) will feel nothing.

Working out with the Orishas

2009-01-11T13:51:00.000-08:00

Well, it’s the New Year which means our gym is once again flooded with out of shape people who have made their New Year’s resolution to lose weight or get into shape. We’ve been going to our gym for several years now and we’ve gotten used to the “newbie season.” Most (but not all) of these folks will come to the gym for a few weeks and then we won’t see them again until next year. It’s a shame that not more folks stick with it. As I was sitting in my gym yesterday watching the newbie show, I got to thinking about exercise and spiritual paths.

I’ve read several books that talked about how a person on a spiritual path should spend at least a year taking some sort of martial art or yoga. I am a big fan of physical activity. I also believe that our bodies are physical channels to the spiritual plane and if your channel is clogged from junk food, drugs/alcohol, lack of exercise, etc., it makes it much harder for that channel to operate. However, making a blanket statement that only martial arts or yoga has a spiritual value is kinda stupid.

My husband is a child of Ogoun, the Orisha of iron. My husband loves to pump iron. He loves the feel and smell of the iron weights. The free weight section of our gym has become a sort of temple of worship for him. He’s not really interested in taking martial arts and I got a real dirty look when I invited him to my yoga class but he’s almost giddy sometimes when he heads to his free weight room.

My point here is this, the Orishas are going to respond to different forms of exercise. When I am in my yoga class I can feel Oya with me. I believe she also likes aerobics and the kickboxing classes. Oshun likes those exercise/dance classes. Our gym has one that’s based on some very sexy form of dancing and that is so up Oshun’s alley. Both Oshun and Yemaya like the pool. I would expect to find Yemaya in the water aerobics classes. My gym, like many others, have special classes for seniors. Nana Buruku can probably be found in one of those.

I personally have also caught site of Chango at our gym. He will spend time in the free weight room (especially in front of the mirror) but I have also spotted him following the ladies around on the machines. I would almost bet a paycheck that the best place to find Ellegua in the gym is the ladies locker room! Ellegua is very fast so he’s probably a runner.

Not all of the Orishas are going to be comfortable in the gym. As a general rule, all of the Orishas love the great outdoors but Obatala and Ochosi are going to be much at home in the wilderness than the gym. Obatala loves to hike in nature. He prefers the woods but the desert is good also. Ochosi is quite shy and likes to run so I picture him as one of those long distance runners or bicyclists.

I think sticking to a physical fitness routine (whatever it is) for a year (or hopefully longer) is a great personal goal regardless of whether or not it has spiritual implications for you. If you are spiritually minded, adding physical exercise that enriches your body and soul will add even more benefit to your life. If you are on a tight budget and paying for a gym is out of the question, just getting some quality time outdoors will be a huge benefit to you and perhaps give you a peaceful moment to commune with the higher powers.

Coffee with Baron Samedi

2009-01-08T16:55:00.000-08:00

The Baron showed up in our lives a couple of weeks before Hurricane Katrina. He just showed up with no warning. He didn’t seem to want anything, he just hung out and drink coffee. Now, let me tell you...the Baron has a definite presence to him. Generally, he makes people horny and sleepy.

We got to know the Baron pretty well in those couple of weeks. He has a wonderful sense of humor and he loves coffee…Especially Starbucks coffee. And porn. He’s a big fan of porn. He is a jovial guy. He’s tired of black and purple. He feels that it’s way over done. He’s quite fond of bright, multi-colored clothing. He’s also likes green. I believe the Baron has a strong shamanistic origin and that could be where the green comes into it. He’s very earthy. Sometimes he’s hard to understand because he comes from a dreamy place. He commonly comes in your dreams. More than once I have woken up not being able to remember my dream but just knowing he was there.

The Baron has obvious connections to sex and death but really he can help end any situation. He’s also the last doorway between life and death so some people will ask him to intercede on behalf of a sick person. If the Baron doesn’t take them, they will not go. Don’t try to do spells to him. Just ask him to do something. He’ll either do it or he won’t. He doesn’t have initiates or priest/priestesses but I have heard him refer to his “favorites.” Besides coffee, the Baron also likes dark rum, cigars and tobacco and Starbuck’s coffee flavored liqueur. He’s very fond of the Blondie song “Rapture.” Watch the video.

So, for two weeks we sat around staring at each other wondering why he was around. And then the hurricane hit. We watched on the news as New Orleans drowned. It was surreal. The Baron watched with us, silent but present. Suddenly, he had nothing to say. San Antonio, Texas (where some of us reside) started accepting evacuees pretty quickly. Our city ended up hosting a large number of folks from Louisiana. After awhile I got tired of watching the news and crying all the time, so I went down and volunteered with the Red Cross for a couple of days. It made me feel better.

Quite a few of the folks from evacuation ended up staying in San Antonio. San Antonio is a city that’s always been pretty racially diverse and now we have the benefit of a little more New Orleans flavoring. We are lucky in that several new Cajun restaurants have opened (yeah!). Now, if we could just get a Café du Monde! The Baron has also stayed here in our lovely city.

I don’t know how much the Baron knew about the hurricane ahead of time. I do believe that’s why he came. I am glad he did, I just wish the circumstances had been different but my spiritual ohana is better for it.